I remember the agony of being on the hockey pitch, my lips turning bluer by the minute, shivering with cold, hoping to be picked. A blustery wind tore at my green pleated skirt, made my hair fly all over my face, and left me breathless as I tried out for a place in the team.
There have been several situations in my life where I desperately wanted to fit in or properly belong somewhere. Yet there were many closed doors, and they made me feel so inadequate. Maybe you can relate? It’s painful to be shut out, isn’t it?
My sense of not belonging began with my family of origin, where I longed to be accepted and loved for who I really was, quirks and all, but it didn’t happen. It’s a lingering pain which still hurts, but has been assuaged somewhat since Jesus came into my life and made me God’s adopted child by faith in Him.
“Fitting in is about assessing a situation and becoming who you need to be in order to be accepted. Belonging, on the other hand, doesn’t require us to change who we are; it requires us to be who we are.” — Brené Brown, Daring Greatly
Where you belong
You are seeking
a place in this world
which will greet you kindly,
a place where you belong,
accepted just as you are,
greeted with open arms unfurled.
But your searching
does not assuage the ache
you often feel within,
when rejection or disinterest
serve to make your soul
sink, your eyes well up,
your heart quake, and your faith
seem as insubstantial
as the very air you breathe.
What you cannot see
is the way it holds
you firmly, holds you fast,
like a solid soul support,
like the rock it is,
like an invisible thread.
Because it’s about more
than your faltering
self-belief, your uncertainty
over this and that,
for God himself
is the warp and weft of all
your days, and the one who
holds you up when you fall
or feel afraid. All you need do
is lean harder on him
and relax into your true,
God-given identity.
This world will try to steal
your peace, but you can
keep your head lifted high
because you are God’s child,
adopted by faith in Christ
set free to live a fuller life,
as you trust him to be strong
where you are weak,
because with him you belong.
(C) joylenton
Belonging is such a vital part of being human because we’re made for relationship and connection, for loving and being loved. And when those things are hard for us in one way or another? Why then we falter, feel like a failure, as if we don’t really belong anywhere. But the truth (and Good News) is we do, and always have, belonged in the Father’s heart of love for us. 🙂 ❤
“I have come home at last! This is my real country! I belong here. This is the land I have been looking for all my life, though I never knew it till now.” — C.S Lewis, The Chronicles of Narnia: The Last Battle
Poetry Joy 
Such beautiful poetry filled with grace. Thanks.
Thank you, Shirley! I’m glad it spoke to you, my friend. ❤️
Joy, your poem is so inspiring and reassuring. We don’t need to try to fit in anywhere. We already belong to God. He is always there for us, leading, holding, comforting and so much more. And when we are struggling, like your poem says, we need to lean harder on Him.
I am always encouraged when I read your words, Joy. You always point us to the One who will meet all our needs. In Him we find peace and rest.
Blessings, love and hugs to you, my dear sister/poet/friend! xoxo
Gayl, I love the way you have affirmed the truth and wonder of our belonging to God. It’s such a comforting thought especially when we are struggling with poor self-esteem. I’m grateful for the opportunity to bless and encourage you, and always delighted whenever you drop by. Blessings, love and hugs to you, too, dear sister/poet/friend! xoxo 😊❤️
Thank you, dear Joy, for sharing your precious heart with us. We are so quick to forget this:
Because it’s about more
than your faltering
self-belief, your uncertainty
over this and that,
for God himself
is the warp and weft of all
He truly holds us, drawing us to Himself through all of these days. I needed this encouragement so much today. And you are the 2nd one to quote “The Last Battle” this week. I think that maybe I need to re-read that favorite again. We are headed towards our true country. Amen. Love, blessings, and hugs dear heart-sister. xoxo
Dear Bettie, you have touched on an aspect of the poem which I very much identify with. I need frequent reminders of how very present God is with me in my ordinary days. This poem was written partly out of my own experience and partly to encourage others in their walk of faith. Amen to this: “He truly holds us, drawing us to Himself through all these days.” I’ve also got a hankering to revisit C.S Lewis’ marvellous series, and this book in particular, if only I knew just where I have put it! Too many books and all that… though it might have been passed on to one of our sons. Better have a look for it soon. Sending love, blessings and hugs to you, too, dear heart-sister. xoxo 💜🌸
Good morning, Joy. What powerful words of hope. “an invisible thread” … you describe the underpinnings of faith (that which we are sometimes unaware) so well. I have read a couple of Brene Brown books when God was teaching me about belonging and perfectionism. They spoke loudly to me. Belonging is essential to our soul. I stand often on His truth in John 14:18, that He will not leave me as orphan, that I have a Father who loves me more than I can ever imagine. Like you, there are times when I am reminded of the past. We are chosen daughters saved by His grace, spoken to from heaven because He loves us. May He keep giving you words to share as He strengthens you with His power and wisdom and amazing mercies. Love, Julie
Good evening, Julie, I’m so glad you found the poem full of hope. Brene Brown’s books have really spoken to me too. I agree that “Belonging is essential to our soul.” The sting of not belonging is a painful experience indeed. Thank you for reminding me to stand on John 14:18 and similar bible verses. That’s the best way to overcome the enemy’s lies and start fully believing who we are in Christ. I love the thought of being God’s “chosen daughter saved by grace” and how comforting it is to dwell on it. Thank you, too, for the gracious blessing. I receive it by faith. Love, Joy xo ❤️
Often He uses those times of rejection and of just not fitting in to lead us to a place in Him where He becomes enough. Once He is enough and we have learned our true place of belonging, as you say, we are set free. Beautiful post, Joy! Blessings on your Sabbath.
You’re right, June. That’s very much been my experience. I’m still a work-in-progress in being set free, but the small signs of release which God has given me have already encouraged my heart and deepened my faith and trust. Thank you for your kind encouragement, and for sharing your wise insights here, June. I hope and pray you are keeping well and can rest in your own place of belonging in Christ. Blessings on the week ahead, dear friend! xo 😊❤️