waiting: when desire gives way to deeper surrender

August 13, 2020August 13, 2020 / Joy Lenton / 4 Comments

I’m feeling fried and frazzled in a scorching August heatwave. As I’m waiting to cool down, I’m reminded that the earth itself is incrementally heating up. We sense the stirrings of earth’s birth pangs, the longing it has for deliverance, and considered attention from its custodians.

Our own hearts (never mind our bothered bodies) can feel unsettled by a yearning for change. Because waiting is hard, isn’t it? Our society and world at large are like life on speed, with a drivenness that doesn’t sit easily with being rested, calm and at peace.

We all sit with unfulfilled desires. One of mine is to write more books before I get too ill, too old or lose my poetic touch. I long to unleash all the creativity that lies within me, rather than sitting on dusty files which remind me that those books are not going to write themselves… get a move on, girl! Only impatience isn’t conducive to getting a good result. 😉

“In the drivenness of our society, it’s hard to make time to relax our efforts and find transforming energy. That’s why we need this particular posture of waiting so much. When we sit in this way we’re relaxing the bow; we’re coming to rest in a very deep way in God, allowing ourselves to be cradled in the sighing mystery of Christ’s prayer.”— When the Heart Waits: Spiritual Direction for Life’s Sacred Questions by Sue Monk Kidd

Desire

desire at rest
cultivated by God’s grace
in the waiting room
where we learn to still our hearts
quiet the rush, quell our thoughts

the divine promise
gets birthed and earthed in us
in God’s timing
we will finally receive
an abundance of good things

in this posture
where submissiveness counts
where trust is formed
here we mature, learn and grow
develop patience in our souls

soul detachment
enables us to let go
of our wanting
and expectancy follows
when we embrace faith and hope

freedom of desire
might feel alien to us
it’s a holy thing
where our desires and will line up
with what the Father wants for us
© joylenton

“That is why waiting does not diminish us, any more than waiting diminishes a pregnant mother. We are enlarged in the waiting. We, of course, don’t see what is enlarging us. But the longer we wait, the larger we become, and the more joyful our expectancy” — Romans 8:24–25 The Message

May I pray for you, my friend?

Dear Father God,

Thank you for your loving and protective care of us. Our days are an open book to you because you hold past, present and future in your hands. Help us to wait with patient expectation and confident trust when we desire to forge ahead with this project or that. If we’re in a season of being slowed, grant us the ability to stay encouraged and calm, and believe for better days to come. May we learn to go with the natural rhythm and flow of our days and remain sensitive to Holy Spirit’s gentle leading and guiding.

Amen

May we remember that however far we might stray, get impatient or fail to sense His presence, God is always eagerly waiting for us to turn to Him. 😊❤️

stilling: learning to love your ordinary life

August 6, 2020August 6, 2020 / Joy Lenton / 6 Comments

“This is a wonderful day. I’ve never seen this one before.” — Maya Angelou

So often fear of change nibbles at our souls like a restless rat. It makes us fail to appreciate what we already have before us, right here, right now. I find myself falling into a dissatisfaction trap whenever I forget to live with mindful awareness and a joyful and grateful heart.

We can get so caught up in the challenges, fears and frustrating minutiae of life that we neglect to lift up our heads and appreciate where and how we are really situated. God is the giver of all good gifts, and He strews gifts of grace along each person’s daily pathway—but we need receptive eyes, stilled minds, and open hearts to see, sense and be thankful for them.

Because each day presents us with an opportunity to taste joy, sense the marvellous in the mundane, express our gratitude, and give God praise for who He is and how He takes such great care of us.

“So much has been given to me; I have no time to ponder over that which has been denied.” — Helen Keller

Stilling

I hold my breath—as if I could
still the clock, hold back
the swinging seasons, perhaps,

call time on winter’s
cold, dark, muffled cloak,
the icy grip of SAD that sends
me to my inner knees.

Can I not simply
still time on this moment’s
pendulum, which I prefer

to those that have gone
before? Those lockdown
days, weeks and months
of great adaptation and change.

My mind (helpfully) reminds
me that nothing stays
the same. Each dull routine

still has to yield
to the unexpected,
the suddenness of the new
or the long neglected.

Yet something in me
feels as if I want
to remain rooted in Now,

to savour summer
before it segues into autumn,
get my fill of light, of warmth,
of hope, and snatches of joy.

Then another thing
comes to my remembrance,
and I muse on the way

each day has opportunity
to receive such gifts
if I remain receptive enough

to notice, and still
my heart to not reject them.
© joylenton

“As long as this exists, this sunshine and this cloudless sky, and as long as I can enjoy it, how can I be sad?” — Anne Frank

Although I frequently want to press pause on the moments I enjoy because they seem so fleeting, it isn’t a life of busy eventfulness I crave but a stilled, peaceful soul saturated in holy satisfaction, love and grace. Keeping a daily gratitude journal helps us stay calm and content. Here are 3 things I’m grateful for:

having energy and focus enough to write this post
our tomatoes are greening at last, if not reddening yet
I prepared this before a scorching heatwave hit to fog my thoughts

What are you thankful for today, my friend? 🙂 ❤

wave: seeking to stay buoyant in life’s choppy waters

July 30, 2020July 29, 2020 / Joy Lenton / 6 Comments

“Who is like you, Lord God Almighty? You, Lord, are mighty, and your faithfulness surrounds you. You rule over the surging sea; when its waves mount up, you still them.” — Psalm 89:8-9 NIV

Each summer I yearn to go to the coast, inhale the ozone and watch waves rise, foam and fall. It would be such a soothing sight, calming and restorative to my soul. Who wouldn’t want to sit, observe (people-watch) and breathe in the view or swim and be cradled by lapping water and get wet through? Even a virtual non-swimmer like me relishes such thoughts.

Sadly, the limitations of having M.E and chronic illness, including impaired mobility, hypersensitivity to light, a pain-filled, uncooperative body that doesn’t cope well with exertion, humidity or heat, coupled with travel-induced fatigue, and Raynaud’s Syndrome causing shivers and blanching at the slightest sea breeze, make it rather problematical for me now.

Instead, I remember times past, decades ago, when I was able to enjoy watching waves without those restrictions. We spent several hot summer days on the local beaches, getting sand in our sandwiches, paddling or swimming in the sea, playing games with the children, and marvelling at our suntanned faces and limbs. Now I muse on waves as a poet might do because they have such great symbolism too.

The wave we need

We are paddling furiously
as if it all depends on us,
not on the tide or the rhythm

of the sea. Fearing falling,
we forget to lean
into the waves, forget

to check our position
and what we might have
to depend on. Forget, too,

to relax our bodies
into suppleness,
cut ourselves some slack.

Instead, we waver,
like uncertain skittles,
wobble around,

choke, sink close
to drowning. Until we hear
a calming voice calling,

speaking softly
to our souls, then more
urgently than before. His voice

rises clearly above and cuts
across the choppy waters,
urging us to let him be

the wave we need, the support
to lift us when we fall, the one
who carries us effortlessly.
© joylenton

If you, like me, would appreciate a reminder of hearing waves breaking on the seashore, maybe this short sea breathing technique video from former M.E sufferer, meditation author and creative communicator Liz Babbs will help, and relax your soul. 🙂 ❤

reality: what helps keep us grounded and at peace

July 23, 2020July 22, 2020 / Joy Lenton / 11 Comments

These are deeply unsettling times we are living in, aren’t they? They make us yearn for a sense of solidity and thirst for a firm grounding beneath our feet. Perhaps it exists as a present reality, closer at hand than we might think.

Creation breathes out its beauty and begs us to receive it as soul food, as a nurturing balm to help us stay grounded and calm. Each time we pay attention to growing flowers and plants we get to observe how nature deals with its own seasons of alteration and loss.

In the tanka sequence poem below, I invite you to take a journey of the heart, a pause to consider what nature has to teach us now, what lies ahead, and how we are all connected to the past.

May you receive an awakening of hope and faith that will help ground you in the realest of realities. Namely that God is still in charge, and all things are somehow being worked out for good even as our lives feel shaken to the core.

Reality

what is real
is the soil beneath our feet
solidity
earth grounds us, holds us fast
when all else trembles into dust

the imprints
markers of every man
woman and child
who ever lived and died
are seeded, left behind

the earth
holds all our memories
in its DNA
it doesn’t forget how we lived
breathed and walked this way

every acreage
in the changing landscape
holds a legacy
it will keep the faith for us
when we are lost, faithless

nature sings
an eternal siren song
we strain to listen
unaccustomed to its melody
the way it reverberates and speaks

our reality
is so often shaped by lust
fuelled by greed
hot desire can set us on fire
we lose what we have coveted

we don’t need
all that much to survive
we do need
the insight to understand
just how to live, grow and thrive

the natural world
provides all our necessities
all we need to live
enough resources to share
if we were generous and fair

the ethereal
the mystical, intangible
lies within our reach
it’s already invaded earth
promising us new life, new birth

our souls
rooted to earth’s reality
become whole
when they are connected
to Father, Son, Holy Spirit

God made
all that is sensed and found
he gave
his life to open our eyes
to the unlimited beyond
© joylenton

“The calm of a summer night
embodies Your peace, O Lord.
The beauty of a sunset
embodies Your truth, O Lord.
Everything in all creation
shouts the reality of You.”

— Transformed by Love: Prayers and Reflections for All Seasons by Liz Babbs

plea: for when you are in need of prayer and help

July 16, 2020January 11, 2024 / Joy Lenton / 4 Comments

Prayer can take many shapes and forms, ranging from a simple, urgent plea for help to the intricacies of formal litany and liturgy. Prayer might be silent, spoken words or repetitive chant. Whether short or long, all our prayers are heard and answered by God, usually with a “yes”, “no” or “wait”, though not always in ways we might expect.

“Our prayers may be awkward. Our attempts may be feeble. But since the power of prayer is in the one who hears it and not in the one who says it, our prayers do make a difference.” — Max Lucado

The poem I’m sharing today was birthed in a place of extra weakness, weariness, anxiety and pain. When we feel that way it’s often hard to pray, isn’t it? At such times we might prefer to let our tears speak for themselves, ask family and friends for support, or turn to the written prayers of others for inspiration and help.

If anything resonates with you in the words below, feel free to use them for yourself. I’m always happy if others can see merit in the thoughts God gives me to share. And I’m always blessed if I can encourage someone else, which we can all do by our testimony and prayers, even when we’re struggling ourselves.

A plea

oh let me rest
lean my head on Jesus’ breast
and hear God’s heartbeat
pounding softly through my days
like a metronome of grace

oh let me stay
may I faithfully remain
listen well with love
keep a vigil by his side
the best place for me to thrive

oh let me know
become wise, not shallow
learn how to live
full of compassion, like him
ready to help and to give

oh let me accept
how to live without regret
while I stretch my faith
note my own limitations
empowered by his strength

oh let me wait
when prayer seems unanswered
make space for grace
for God’s perfect timing
and sense his peace within
© joylenton

“God can handle your doubt, anger, fear, grief, confusion, and questions. You can bring everything to him in prayer.” — Rick Warren

You can pray about anything. Nothing is too small or too great to bring to God. He hears the cries of our hearts and never becomes wearied by our need of Him. If you are having a hard time of things, please let me know so I can pray for you. You could leave a message here or email me via my contact page instead. It would be an honour to support you, my friend. Blessings and love. xo ❤️🙏🏻🌺

light: illuminating and offering us hope in the darkness

June 4, 2020June 3, 2020 / Joy Lenton / 5 Comments

“However late you think you are, however many chances you think you have missed, however many mistakes you feel you have made or talents you think you don’t have, or however far from home and family and God you feel you have traveled, I testify that you have not traveled beyond the reach of divine love. It is not possible for you to sink lower than the infinite light of Christ’s Atonement shines.” ― Jeffrey R. Holland

Illuminating

Just as the soft rays of light
spill down a rock face,
gently probing each surface
when dawn breaks,

slowly illuminating, revealing
its many cracks and crevices,
may the hardened exterior
of my soul respond

to the light of holy love
shining on my flaws, my mistakes
with laser-light precision,
marked by mercy and forgiveness,
handled with so much grace.

And in this slow
awakening, may I not resist
its dart of golden beams
but yield to their inspection,

knowing their purpose
is to lead me deeper into
self-awareness so God can sift
the chaff of my circumstances,

as he notes where risen ears
of wheat might reside among
the tares and sharpest thorns

which require his infinite
tenderness, his wisdom in knowing
what to heal, to keep or reject.
© joylenton

Holy love illuminates our lives, illustrates our need for change, shines with glory and brilliance and offers us Hope in the darkness. God’s light is revealed to us in Christ and in a thousand tiny ways as we go about our daily lives. May He give us eyes to see it and respond. 🙂 ❤

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.” ― Martin Luther King, Jr.

hope: listening for the sound of hope in your soul

May 21, 2020May 21, 2020 / Joy Lenton / 11 Comments

“Hope is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul and sings the tune without the words — And never stops at all.” — Emily Dickinson

Notes of hope

A blackbird’s throaty warble
rises above the voices
on the street, making conversation

because we’re all hungry
for company, for solace,
even at two metres apart.

But I’m listening more
to the notes of hope and joy,
bringing a reminder
that this too shall pass,

time will move on as it
always does, and we will return
to a new normality at last.

My solitary blackbird
friend has no soul companions
but it doesn’t deter him

from belting out his song,
from shrugging off the sadness
because he’s on his own.

He is staying put—for now,
to bring cheer to our hearts,
hope for the housebound
and isolated, while he sings

of spring, of life and birth, burgeoning
earth, of newness, of growth and hope
continuing beyond this moment.
© joylenton

“Never be afraid to trust an unknown future to a known God.” — Corrie Ten Boom

release: the pain and the gain of letting go

May 14, 2020May 14, 2020 / Joy Lenton / 6 Comments

These strange times we are in call for an eventual release, don’t they? Getting back to the world of school and work, perhaps. Returning to our usual activities in a new normality we’re still uncertain about.

I’ve been thinking about life’s many moments of small release, adjusting to our losses, a necessary moving on and moving forward, including the great letting go we will all experience one day.

When the time comes

When the time comes, let it go,
learn to release each care,
each sorrow like so much
wheat chaff blowing in the wind,
being carried who knows where
or who knows when.

Do not cling too tightly to life
as if it were all you had
because a greater life, a better
love, a softer peace exists,
waiting beyond the blue
with its arms open for you.

Seek to live as truly, fully
and freely as you can,
while you stay mindful
of its transitory state,
of its preciousness,
its wonder, colour and grace.

Learn to love the sacred
ordinariness each day offers
you like a gift,
holding it close but not too
close, knowing it will end
swift as sun sinks vermilion
and a curtain of dark descends.

When the time comes
try to be prepared, ready
to release, as you thank
each gift, each person, each thing
that has meant something
for being part of your life.

Before it happens,
make sure that you get
to notice it all,
everything good, bad, indifferent,
because it has helped
to shape and form
the person you have become.

In the early years
you can be forgiven
for your nonchalance
and insouciance, but not
as you gather to your breast
loved ones, special relationships.

Later on, when the dandelion
clock is looking a little
threadbare, pared back,
let yourself reflect
on what has gone, what has
passed to bring you to Now.

As time elapses, seek to hold
lightly to it all,
to anything you value
and all you don’t
because they all count, they all
add up to sand in the hourglass.

So when the time comes
remind yourself of this:
how you have lived,
how you have loved,
and try to forgive yourself
if you think it isn’t enough.

Give yourself grace for being
a flawed human being
who is a delightful mix
of pulled together and mess,
because you’re learning to grow
before you can let go.

Finally, release all your worries,
concerns and stress, let them
tumble off your burdened back
and feel the weight
of your soul’s sheer emptiness.

As the hours nudge closer
to the time you half expect,
even as you look back
with a few regrets, may you
be light as air, bright and happy,
because from hereon? You are free.
© joylenton

Our faith journey is a continual process of letting go of our extraneous stuff and holding tight to the hand of God. We release what doesn’t serve us well and receive the best He has in mind for us.

It takes wisdom and courage to let go but we don’t have to do it alone. God’s help is only a breath, a prayer away. Can I pray for you today, my friend? A load shared is a load lifted… ❤

searching: the eternal quest for meaning and significance

February 6, 2020February 3, 2020 / Joy Lenton / 6 Comments

“When God has become our shepherd, our refuge, our fortress, then we can reach out to him in the midst of a broken world and feel at home while still on our way.” — Henri Nouwen, from Reaching Out in You Are the Beloved: Daily Meditations for Spiritual Living

Searching

Your soul yearns
as you search
for an opening of sorts,
a place to belong
a haven on earth
where you can finally soar.

There are moments
when you forget yourself
because you’re too caught up
in the act
of survival alone,
in simply staying the course.

And there are times
when you wish the earth
would swallow you whole,
like Jonah, gulped down
quick in the belly of a whale
before he was vomited out.

Then you could disappear
with no thought
about making a mark,
getting noticed, perhaps,
a tiny dent to suggest
you were here, you exist.

But if you stop and pause
you might reflect
that you are seen, you are heard
and you are known
by others—you are loved
and infinitely precious to God.

And you can remind
yourself on the greyest of days
that the sun won’t forget
to rise and shine again,
and bathe you in its golden rays
even if it’s pouring with rain.

Each small, positive thought
counts because it builds
on the rest,
as it gathers momentum
and swells its support
like a warm hug in your chest.
© joylenton

May you remember, my friend, that you are not as alone as you might sometimes feel while journeying through life, because fellow travellers walk beside you and God companions you too.

We also have the joy of belonging to the family of God through adoption by faith in Jesus Christ, who is the beginning and end, the Alpha and Omega of all things, including all our seeking and searching.

“True joy is hidden where we are the same as other people: fragile and mortal. It is the joy of belonging to the human race. It is the joy of being with others as a friend, a companion, a fellow traveler. This is the joy of Jesus, who is Emmanuel: God-with-us.” — Henri Nouwen, Daily E-Meditation from Henri Nouwen Society

In his poem ‘Little Gidding’, T.S. Eliot says that we shall not cease our exploring until we “arrive where we started, and… know the place for the first time.” May that thought encourage your heart in all your searching and finding. ❤

slow: heart work that reaps benefits

January 30, 2020January 29, 2020 / Joy Lenton / 6 Comments

“As I live and move and have my being today, show me where you are. Keep my ears attuned toward your voice. Open my eyes to your activity in my life. Help me slow down enough to experience you in the mundane.” — Jesus Every Day: A Journey Through the Bible in One Year by Mary DeMuth

Heart work

Discipline of the heart
sounds like it could be harsh,
but what if it involves a slower pace
and heightened awareness?

Could you and I learn
to discern when it pays us
to cease from our activity,
to be still and quiet, at peace?

Might a letting go of busyness
be a hidden blessing for us,
and just what the doctor
ordered for our harassed hearts?

I believe it is definitely
a great soul benefit
to release our pain, our hurts,
and to freely cast our cares.

We can pause at intervals
throughout the day,
microseconds maybe
where we stop and pray.

It could become second
nature to us as we reap
soul rest and peace, coupled with
the rewards of receiving grace.

We might discover we are also
less inclined to stress about this
and that, if we desist and find
we become more centred and calm.

It would deepen and strengthen
our relationship with God, and with
one another, as we learnt how to
honour the hours and sense his love.
© joylenton

“My strength comes in quietness, in those unseen places where I refuel with you…. In my weariness, thank you for showing me again that every other avenue of help is lifeless. Only you bring genuine rest and life.” – Jesus Every Day: A Journey Through the Bible in One Year by Mary DeMuth

PS: if you’d like to know more about the spiritually mindful practice of slowing down, this post might help. 🙂

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Poetry Joy

sensing the sacred in the everyday

faith

waiting: when desire gives way to deeper surrender

Desire

stilling: learning to love your ordinary life

Stilling

wave: seeking to stay buoyant in life’s choppy waters

The wave we need

reality: what helps keep us grounded and at peace

Reality

plea: for when you are in need of prayer and help

A plea

light: illuminating and offering us hope in the darkness

Illuminating

hope: listening for the sound of hope in your soul

Notes of hope

release: the pain and the gain of letting go

When the time comes

searching: the eternal quest for meaning and significance

Searching

slow: heart work that reaps benefits

Heart work

Desire

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Stilling

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The wave we need

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Reality

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A plea

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Illuminating

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Notes of hope

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When the time comes

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Searching

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Heart work

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