life’s challenges

Living freely

/ Joy Lenton / 15 Comments

Aren’t you relieved there are no identi-kit Christians?

We don’t have to look or sound alike.

Having unity together is more about fellowship and being united in love than having full agreement on more than the fundamentals of our faith.

We are allowed to be ourselves. See wood where others see trees. Sense Holy Spirit’s presence in a variety of ways.

God meets us right where we are, at our point of greatest need.

He chased me and wooed me with His unconditional Love.

It was something I’d never encountered before, but my empty, old before its time, desperate-child heart yearned for it.

Here was safety. Here lay security. Here flowed acceptance and peace.

And I came to faith in a ‘happy-clappy’ environment where joy and exuberance were the order of the day.

I wore ‘Jesus Loves Me/You’ stickers, a big grin, innocent optimism in sharing my new-found life in Christ, and a profound gratitude toward God for the glorious gift of salvation.

So I continued for a little while until mental health breakdown, partial recovery, followed by life’s multiple challenges, another breakdown and a haunting legacy of childhood abuse sucked all the joy out of life.

Depression and emotional pain skewed my thinking, clouded my judgement, and left me lost in the wilderness for many years.

Where did God feature? Was His love enough? Was it my fault?

A slow recovery took place and I had a fresh revelation of grace. I drank it deep into my very being as soul manna and sustenance.

But having begun my faith journey majoring on love and forgiveness, I was still largely ignorant of sin and reluctant to speak or think about it. This woman was already stained by her past, full of guilt, shame, self-recrimination and condemnation. And God loved her anyway. 

Because, wasn’t God a God of love? Didn’t grace and forgiveness cover all?

Oh yes.

Though grace is cheapened if we fail to fully appreciate the price Jesus paid to secure it for us.

Now, a little older (and wiser maybe?), though I still struggle with self-esteem issues and will always veer the conversation round to grace and encouragement than otherwise, it is gradually dawning on me how sin cannot be ignored or swept away.

And I am still getting my head around how to achieve the balance between hating sin yet not hating myself. Maybe you get stuck there too?

My soul seeks freedom from all that chained me and those things enslaving me now.

I want to embrace grace and be free to give it to others.

So I am leaning into His love as I think. question, talk about sin’s effects and outworkings, see how fallible and tainted I am and yet (marvellously) so dearly loved and cherished by our heavenly Father ~ just as you are too.

******

Here is a ‘Prayer Whisper’ which God poured into my listening heart last February. It still speaks volumes to me and I hope it will bless you too:

file000402181324“How easily you can fool yourself that you’re not sinning. To justify your actions with excuses and cover-ups.

Allow My Holy Light to shine upon your thoughts, words and deeds. Do not be afraid of its consuming power. It will not harm you.

I seek only to burn off the dross and detritus you carry. Such things weigh you down, sully your relationship with Me and sour your interactions with others.

I want to set you free, even from those burdens you have barely noticed as such ~ so familiar have they become.

It is only in the cleansing which follows letting go and laying down that real change and transformation can happen.

Bad habits pollute your mind and body. Once you are able to set them down before Me, you can begin the process of breaking free from them.

Open yourself. Be real before Me. I already know everything about you. Seek to live freely and lightly in the liberty of My Presence.

My purity and power are available to enable and equip you for the next stage of your journey.”

********

“The fact that God is love, that He is pure, holy and righteous is the reason why He is angry at sin. It violates, distorts, and destroys what His purpose is. Wrath is inevitable to a God of love, otherwise the love would be tenuous and weak” ~ Charles Price ‘My Daily Journey with Christ’ 

Joining here with Diana and other questing souls as we are #LivingtheQuestions and #LivingintotheAnswers

This week’s question:”What’s with all this talk about sin?”  You are very welcome to hop over and join in the discussion.

Also linking with Mel and Laura

Words for wounded warriors

/ Joy Lenton / 7 Comments

In a season where there is more physical and emotional challenge than usual, it helps to think of others who are also in need.

So many wear smiles on the outside yet feel broken inside.

So many give and give and give some more until they are left as limp, worn-out rags.

It can take all the courage we can muster just to face another day.

And often the most holy thing we can do is just to take a nap.

A heart can ache heavy with unspoken fears and cares.

We can feel alone in a sea of faces.

We can move heaven and earth for our loved ones only to be rejected or neglected.

Try as we might, we cannot suppress all the pain we carry.

As I reflect more on my life in an effort to hear all God may be saying to me, I find myself thrown to my knees more often than not.

And there I discover the One who inhabits all the hard places we find ourselves in.

God’s grace crawls into every crack and crevice of our days.

All the mess and mayhem, muddle and struggle are known to Him.

So we pray…

‘A prayer for the hurting’

God bless the wounded warriors,

the ones who crawl and cry through,

those who press in and press on 

with leaking eyes and leaking wounds,

the battle-scarred and beaten down.

Bless the broken-hearted, bleeding and bruised

 reeds rubbed raw by those who have 

rubbished and rejected them,

those who can barely lift their face

weighed heavy with shame and disgrace.

Hold those who cannot hold on another minute,

whose lives are fear-filled,

whose faces are tear-filled,

who feel empty of worth and value

of no repute, cast aside, left behind.

Keep safe the ones who are drowning,

whose days and nights 

drip with disappointment,

dread, darkness and torment 

of body and soul.

Cradle the lonely;

let your love wash over them,

embrace their emptiness

and fill with the companionship

that only Your Presence provides.

Come alongside the misunderstood,

the marginalised,

the misfits,

the mayhem makers

and risk takers.

Bring strength to the weary,

grace for the weak,

hope for the hurting,

freedom for captives,

peace for the pain.

The path is long, the way is hard,

finishing line too far to see

as we drag there on our knees,

dry and thirsty for relief

desperate for some ease.

Walk with us as you did of old

on sand-crusted shore,

dirt-trodden pathways,

seeking and saving 

those who are lost.

For we need you, Lord Jesus;

Your return seems far off,

We fight and we fail,

shout, cry and rail,

for a touch from above.

Amen

©JoyLenton2013

 “A bruised reed he will not break, and a smouldering wick he will not snuff out” ~ Isaiah 42:3

This poetic prayer lament appeared first on Words of Joy. It is a heart’s cry God delights to answer. Hungry, hurting hearts will always find grace to help in time of need.

May it bless you to read it here and remember that God is with you in every trouble, trial and testing. If you would like me to pray for a specific need, please reply in the comments below.

And keep in mind that God loves you so much, just as you are ~ He really does ~ and wants above all things for you to seek His face in the everyday challenges of life.

Being framed

/ Joy Lenton / 4 Comments

Although it’s an inescapable reality, I try not to write much about or dwell upon my life as an M.E and chronic illness sufferer.

It can feel intrusive enough already.

Each day brings fresh reminders of pain and limitations.

A life framed by feelings I’d rather not have.

They can make life miserable indeed.

Though sharing misery is not really my goal or mission at all.

My emphasis is more on God’s grace to sustain, strengthen, heal and restore than on how it feels to be sick.

But I am making an exception today by sharing a poem that was originally featured on my other writing place Words of Joy and is mentioned in the current post there.

It was written at a time when society’s impressions were being greatly influenced by governmental views and decisions and is very much a poetic lament in support of all who live with such experiences.

Sadly, there has been no let up since.

It speaks of the unwarranted stigma and shame that sufferers can experience.

I hope you will come away from reading it feeling better informed and aware, with some insight into the lives of those with ‘invisible illnesses’.

Being Framed

I’ve been framed, boxed, categorised,

sifted, found wanting in society’s eyes

I’m not the woman they think they see,

but an inner person that’s really me

Viewing the image the mirror provides

if I dare to risk, turning away with sighs

Decades of illness have left their mark

and it’s hard to bear living in shaded dark

My eyes need rest I urgently seek,

the brain is foggy, body made weak

Pain and deformity cripple the frame

and it’s hard to remember inside I’m the same

A woman with dreams and a heart to express

all that’s buried within, though under duress

I want to be seen as I feel inside

but external appearance causes me to hide

Days without number I face my fears

that grow as hard to scale as our home stairs,

that this won’t go away and I might not be healed

that the inner joy may be forever concealed

For it’s hard to stay cheerful, harder still to be bright

in a world that pushes us out of sight

We’re the invisible people, out of the game

our only identity is pain and shame

Huge in number, if weak of voice,

the nameless ones who cannot rejoice

until labels and badges no longer apply

and we don’t have to keep asking you, “Why?”

Why not believe us, why not accept

this could happen to you, being sick and wrecked

Your body a tomb for a spirit that’s chained,

a livelihood lost, prison sentence gained

Eyes that accuse, hearts that are hard

do nothing but continue marking our card

Treated with scorn, hostility, derision,

our whole future residing on whim of decision

Fear haunts our days and disturbs our nights,

energy drained further to keep fighting our rights

Please, won’t you listen and heed the weak

as you hear our stories of the justice we seek?

Please remember we are people too,

not numbers, statistics, a warped world view

Lives are at stake as bodies fail,

strong in intent, though our hearts quail

Life in the Slow Lane can be no life at all

when it grinds to a halt against a brick wall

If you know someone who has M.E,

please help them and tell them you see,

you witness their pain, you understand the need

and you won’t turn away, you will pay heed

All we ask is for people to see who we are,

recognising this disease will take us far

into a future where compassion can reign

instead of resentment, sadness and shame

©JoyLenton2013

Despite the negative tone in the poem above, I am very much kept positive and hopeful by God’s continual outpouring of endurance, strength and love. Some days may be really challenging but His grace is always sufficient for every need.

This topic is being aired today as I am guest posting on my friend Mia’s site. I’d love you to come on over and read the full post here.

Day 5 of 31 days of #poetryforthesoul

Poetry for the soul

/ Joy Lenton / 16 Comments

Many writers/bloggers are joining in with a 31 day writing focus over the month of October inspired by the Nester.

Though I am coming in to this a bit late, my aim is to present a daily poetic piece for you to enjoy here over the next 31 days.

And what could be more appropriate than commencing this on National Poetry Day?

However, as an M.E and chronic illness sufferer, it is a huge undertaking for me.

And I may have days where I fail to accomplish this goal. I hope you will grant me grace in those times.

I aim to showcase mostly unseen work, but to make it easier on myself this venture will also include those of the ‘here’s one I made earlier’ variety too.

Output will vary. Some will be a mix of tiny snippets, haiku or micro-poetry. Others will be longer stand-alone poems and some will be incorporated into blog posts and reflections.

Knowing my physical fragility, low energy and other commitments, I would really value your prayers and support to keep going with this enterprise!

Each poetic offering will be a part of the emphasis here on love, loss, life and faith.

My hope is that you will join me for this regular slot as I really welcome your feedback on what you like and why.

Now on to the first poem:

Strangers

We are strangers

floating on our islands

of indifference

casting watery glances

at the ebbing tides

of our native shore

life’s waters discharging

sickness, sin, and endless despair

throwing in poisoned bait

and receiving likewise

who will heed the cry

of the gentle Fisherman

saying, cast your nets

into My life-blood

and I will be an Anchor

for your souls?

©JoyLenton2013

It’s a brand new day

/ Joy Lenton / 30 Comments

Welcome to my blog. I’m so pleased you are here. This is a brand new one for me.

My usual place to hang out is at Words of Joy

This space is mainly for spilling out the poetic and prayerful.

Many days have been challenging for me of late and I need to remind myself to try to greet each new day with a positive attitude.

Maybe you can relate?

The poem below reflects those thoughts.

Brand New Day

file000984750292

Brand new day
I salute you
though I rise hesitant
weary of mind
heavy of limb
I choose
not to succumb
to sadness within
nor stick on my face
fake rictus grin
rather I aim
to see you aright
as a chance
to start again
after restless night
and begin anew
with mind made up
not to chew
on my problems
or sink
into despair
but to see
potential etched
bright with awareness
of God’s light
beaming still
brand new day
I arise
to salute you
through effort
of will

©JoyLenton2013

“This is the day the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it” ~ Psalm 118:24

This is a small taster for things to come.

Please feel free to leave a comment, share, or subscribe by e-mail.

Thank you so much for stopping by. I am honoured to meet with you here.