Seeking shelter

ashes of love file image ~ post on WoJ

Life can leach the life right out of us if we let it. Drain all vitality. Leave us limp and wilted as can be.

We seek a place to feel safe, free from harm, to rest and recuperate. A shelter for which our soul’s long.

My safe place? In my Saviour’s embrace. Beneath the shadow of His wings.

Clinging close to God’s side is where I want to abide.

And all the more as society (read:government-shaped attitudes) cause me to want to run and hide away.

There is no stable ground to be found in this world. All is shifting sand. Fickle and failing.

Those with sickness, disease and disabilities are increasingly marginalised and ostracised by a society quick to point fingers but slow to lift them to help.

Compassion doesn’t often seem to extend to those too ill to work. We are presumed to be lazy good-for-nothings, until proved otherwise.

The poem below was written out of my personal experience of living with M.E, fibromyalgia and other chronic illness for over 20 years.

I wasn’t going to write today, depleted and drained as I am. But God graced me with these words on a subject I feel strongly about.

It is also written in empathy and sympathy for all who suffer and to honour International ME/CSF/ & FM Awareness Day.

‘Silenced’

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My voice is weak

Silenced by the strong

While I have a soul longing

to seek a place of shelter

Somewhere I can belong

Bathe these wounds

in Gilead’s balm

Receive oil of joy

to slip away from harm

Pain penetrates each day

Its probing fingers linger

like a stubborn stain

Leaving me weaker than before

Coated in a covering of shame

Living on the margins

Broken by its borders

A limp-ragged doll, I blink

wary eyes at society

and slink away to hide

Because I’m washed up

by its tide, become detritus

on the shore, breathless

in my distress, dis-ease

But the Healer hears and sees

Cradles His hurting child

Gathers her fragments, lost soul

Breathes new life, new hope

to restore and make her whole

©JoyLenton2015

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Coming aside

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As Spring begins to segue into Summer I seem to still be rooted to wintry hibernation.

Huddled indoors most days. Too weary and depleted to do much at all.

This has been a long season of withdrawal from all unnecessary busyness, a stilling of the soul, making room for deeper rest.

And I thought I may have been coming out of my self and Spirit-imposed soul sanctuary cocoon by now.

Words are still flowing; I’m keeping communication lines open and staying available to those things which feed my soul.

Yet the vital sap and lasting spark of energy I so desperately long to receive is  missing. I wilt easily.

God is signalling that my highest priority remains to rest in Him, let my mind cease meandering, remember to recharge, pace and sleep.

Because we cannot be fully refuelled, refreshed and restored body and soul without connecting with Him and also disconnecting from those things which steal our soul’s peace.

It may look different for each one of us. Priorities are personal. Some soul-weights sit so heavy and only God can help shift them over time.

So I’m slowly learning to be OK with not being physically active, visible, or crazy-busy in my thoughts – that’s the hardest one to change!

Maybe we can all learn to lean harder on God and become less concerned about doing it all ourselves. It’s worth a try, yes?

I’m joining some soul sisters (and brothers?) over at Kate’s Motaung’s place by sharing a few #FiveMinuteFriday thoughts here today on the word: ‘Meet’. 

It’s a great community of writers who aim to let loose their without-worry words within 5 minutes flat and enjoy reading what arises in the process. You’re very welcome to join in.

START….

‘Come aside’

Come aside, draw back,

pull away from the crowd

You won’t find Me

in busyness and loud

Surrender to silence

Sense My Presence within

Meet with Me in this moment

Let your day now begin

Rest your weary head

on My tender breast

before you fall apart

from sheer emptiness

Seek the soothing calm

of My Father-heart

Here I am present

Here I can be found

Here I meet with those

who are unafraid

to turn off the sounds

upon which their soul clings

©JoyLenton2015 

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All beauty fades

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“Charm is deceptive and beauty soon fades. The woman to be admired and praised is the woman who lives in the Fear-of-God” ~ Proverbs 31:30 (The Message)

‘All beauty fades’

All beauty fades

Each petal that falls

Each shaking loose

Each uncovering

lets in more shade

Soon there will be

nullifying nakedness

Bare stems remain

as thin reminder

Appeal for mercy

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And even these

droop low to ground

Stoop old, sigh

final breath

Lase last leaves

A turn to grey

Grave mulch and dust

A crumbling ash

from whose ember

new life holds sway

©JoyLenton2015 

“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, and into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade – kept in heaven for you, who through faith are shielded by God’s power until the coming of the salvation that is ready to be revealed in the last time” ~ 1 Peter 1:3-5

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Love came

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‘Love came’

Love does not shout its name

Though the cross is a megaphone

to rouse a deaf world

Love is likened to a rose

as it gradually unfurls

Releasing its scent into the air

fragrancing the atmosphere

Lightening the hearts of all

who inhale its heart

and are in its thrall

Love whispers soft in dreams

Causing a swift awakening

It seems ethereal as mist

and lingers long

like a wanton kiss

Betrayal may bring it out

when deep feelings inside

emerging as anger, surge

from one to another

Love came and gave its all

to a world still sleeping

With a hammering and a bleeding

seal stamped on wood

Nailing itself to those unheeding

who could turn a blind eye

to a tearing in their sky

Love may have seemed to disappear

But it stayed in all hearts

who welcomed it here

©JoyLenton2015

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A sea change season

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The bird sitting proud on its perch looked down loftily, maybe wondering at the peculiarity of human beings.

I leant on my stick and breathed in sea air. Gulped greedily as if I was drowning, starved of oxygen.

And maybe I was. Drowning for a difference, starving for more than the life I’d been living, desperate for change.

Needing to exhale out the old and breathe deep of the new.

Too many days spent captive in the house. Bound by weakness, sickness and weariness for months on end.

I was starving for the light outside. Feeling freedom calling in my veins. My soul ached for ocean but I’d settle for sea or even a riverside view.

I wanted to wend my way to water, feel sea breeze and feel alive again. Do you ever get that feeling?

It isn’t necessary to have chronic illness to experience moments of feeling confined and constrained by circumstances.

To have a longing to break free from our normality. Live life with deeper awareness and passion.

And I’m discovering the best sort of freedom is sensed inwardly, when we know we are loved by God and can live and love freely ourselves because He lives within.

Now, a healing of sorts had enabled me to tread into new territory. A gift of grace equipping me to step outside the house at last.

So I was able to sample the delights of Blakeney Quay on my beloved’s birthday last month. I hope the photographs I took will offer a taste of the quay for you too if you also yearn for water.

‘By still waters’

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If you go down to the quay today

and lift your eyes a while,

you may slowly gaze at snake of sea

threading its fine ribbon of blue

through swathes of soft shoreline

where its held fast at bay

And if you linger long enough,

you’ll hear a siren-song

of gulls wheeling their way clear of land

and sea as they lift free

with a hue and cry, barreling high

toward vast stretch of sky

But boats lie idling, still as statues

on the sand, apart from

a brave few out on far horizon

Bobbing with will of wind

Resisting lure of land and going

wherever love sends them

©JoyLenton2015

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New life through death

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As Holy week comes toward its grand finale, it’s good to pause and consider the cost of our salvation.

I am pondering all that led to Jesus’ death and what it really means to live in the light of His finished work on the cross.

All that is lifeless within can be enlivened by His Spirit and changed by His grace.

New life through death.

New birth and new beginning.

We ponder and we wonder anew at all Jesus went through to bring us back to God the Father, to restore all that the enemy has stolen.

There is so much more here than one poem can convey.

Far more than I can easily express.

But I hope it will give you a tiny glimpse behind the scenes of Christ’s path to Calvary and its tremendous implications for all mankind.

‘An enlivening spark’

Kaleidoscope colours in your life and mine

collide in varied hues of the human condition

Fractured, splintered at times beyond recognition

So many shade to grey, loom dim and dark

without that vital, enlivening spark

We rest beneath the shadow of the cross

A place which collects all our pain and loss

We crest the hill of Golgotha rising

Eyes straining to see beyond its horizon

We witness a sacred flood of crimson-red

where our Saviour suffered, died and bled

Our own violence and tears join hands

with the punishment our sin demands

Kneeling, weeping, wondering anew

as resurrection Light and power break through

with glory, radiance of Love divine

©JoyLenton2015

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Being broken

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‘Being broken’

Your voice whispered urgent, imploring

Calling me to come away

Take a break

Stay close to Your side a while

Abide in restful invisibility

close to Your heart

before I break and come

apart on the inside

Little did I know how my soul

longed for less exposure

Less busyness

Less stress

Little did I know how it would

reveal my deepest needs

Become a breaking

and a making of me

Peel back layers of sensitivity

Unloose the woman of God

You desire me to be

Now, broken by Your grace,

I seek solace, and I find

Rest for my spirit and mind

within Your inviting embrace

©JoyLenton2015

Friends, it looks like the poet in me is ready for release with a breaking of a God-inspired, self-imposed silence over the last month.

It feels good to be back sharing my words again with the wonderful community of #fiveminutefriday writers!

Thank you for your kind comments, thoughts and prayers over the last few weeks. They have blessed and sustained me more than you know. 🙂

I’m still taking things easy, resting and pacing and only writing as God gives me inspiration and anointing. But I’m so thankful for this opportunity to join in and share here today.

Living on the edge

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Living on the edge unsettles me. I’m hard-wired for safety. Live in the pursuit of peace. Find my rest in refuge.

Though I yearn for the ease of feeling more secure, of trusting so fully in God I am like a carefree child splashing in the sea of His grace.

When parental rejection, the sting of guilt and shame, or society’s scorn casts us off as being unworthy of attention, then we can feel miserable, marginalised, desperate for approval.

Being accepted, being heard, being respected, being loved is what our needy hearts long for.

The world’s way is to embrace you one day and spit you out the next.

Without deliberately seeking it, we have become edge-dwellers, shifting shadows on the margins.

What do we do when life tips us sideways and hisses, ‘You’re not enough’? Maybe measures us by the size of our wallet, the way we live, the gifts we give?

We look to the One who speaks a soft, soothing whisper to our souls. He says we are His cherished possession, dearly beloved, fully accepted in Him. We ~ you and me ~ are enough because He is Enough, so much so He died to save us.

Jesus came humble, came lowly, and seeks those who feel ‘less than’ to give them more than they ever could hope for or imagine.

And as we seek after Jesus, we see how He stoops in tenderness to offer us comfort, reassurance and hope.

In following His ways we will find ourselves living on the edge, on the margins at times, at odds with the world’s ways of thinking and reacting.

Because all who strive to live a God-centred life will encounter resistance, rejection and strife.

But we will also have opportunity to follow Christ, to be in relationship with Him from now to eternity and receive all that our empty, thirsty souls need to be fully satisfied.

‘Living on the edge’

Lord,

I feel like I’m living on the edge

of society, with a longing to be

more, to discover, to explore

and uncover deep hidden things

for which my impoverished soul sings

Most of life feels like a race

for which I have no pace or speed

Where the primary function seems

to be to make a mark, to succeed

And as I scoop with eager arms

to catch a smidgen of success,

it very quickly loses charm and

leaves me breathless, needing rest

Depleted, weary, scarred and torn,

I feel the blast, the heat

of this world’s scorn, and have

to make a swift retreat

On the edge of obscurity

can feel a scary place to be

until I pause, sense your presence,

then reassurance comes to me

You chose the road-less-travelled

You were often on your own

You didn’t become unravelled

but kept your counsel and your calm

Found purpose in doing the Father’s will,

strength from resting completely still in Him

And wisdom from Holy Spirit’s refill

Jesus, I want to live this way

To follow hard after your heart

In all I do, think and say, please

help me to live right, do my part

©JoyLenton2014

Friend, you don’t have to wait for the world to approve of you; God already does.

Come to Him; read His word, see and hear how much He loves you, receive His cleansing, forgiveness, mercy and grace, and learn to live freely again in His loving embrace.

**NOTE** ~ This post was written a while back and sat in draft form ready for a time such as this when energy is low and I’m away enjoying some special with the family. I am grateful to God for inspiration coming in abundance sometimes so I have the ability to share later. 🙂

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A many splendid thing

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‘Love is..’

A tearing apart of heart and soul

as two together make a whole.

Fire, fight, steam and bluster,

the tenderest words that we can muster

Raw, wounded vulnerability,

liberation and setting free

Becoming united for better or worse,

celebrating our beloved in verse

Forgiving, forgiving, and forgiving again

as hearts weigh heavy with sorrow and pain

Keeping one another in cosy company

for there’s no other place we’d rather be

Living, laughing and crying as one,

wonder and hope in a morning sun

A hand to hold on a chilly day,

soothing when things don’t go our way

Our companion throughout the night,

deep reassurance it will be all right

Growing, maturing, ageing together,

surviving all kinds of stormy weather

God’s best gift to fallen humanity,

our anchor, safe place we long to be

Smiles and cuddles, a warm embrace,

a thing of beauty ~ by God’s grace

©JoyLenton2014

“We love because he first loved us” ~ 1 John 4:19

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Courage to break free

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‘Brave’

She doesn’t feel brave at all.

It started with a tentative unpicking

Loosing a thread

Dropping a stitch

that spooled and pooled out

all the dirt, debris and detritus

of a life lived edged by despair

and heavy with deceit

Let it out, my friend.

Let it pour as tears

cascading as rivers down your face

Allow that searing wound to be pierced,

lanced with laser-light of Truth;

be exposed, raw, oozing its badness,

ready for cleansing and healing.

Let God’s healing balm bind up the pain

as more threads are snipped

and a life laid bare.

Unravelling of mind and heart

Whispers in the dark

Furtive fumbling

leaving muddy footprints

of fear, guilt and shame.

Be bold

Be brave, sweet sister.

Only in the letting go

can we be free

as chrysalis to butterfly,

become all He created us to be.

Become new

Washed in Blood

Washed in Light

Washed in Grace

Washed in Love.

You are brave

You are bold

You are beautiful

And you are being

set free

to be fully functioning

as you are intended to be.

©JoyLenton2015

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