Poetry

Longing to move

/ Joy Lenton / 2 Comments

dancing queen PJ file image

‘Final fling’

‘Dancing Queen’ did it for me

My final fling before

becoming so ill with M.E

I haven’t danced since

at a wedding, or some other place

If I did I’d probably fall

completely flat on my face

But I long to move

with style, rhythm,

ease and grace

For these limbs to

writhe smooth, and free from

stiffness, pain, infirmity

No fatigue would

slow me down

I’d be able to

walk all over town

to stride out with

confidence and strength

instead of limping along

in a weakened state

Maybe one day…

I will move with new style,

with energy and pace

For now… I rest, watch others,

wait here patient a while

sit still, with happy-tappy feet

and a wistful smile on my face

©JoyLenton2014

Now, I dance on the inside as my soul rejoices to know God’s goodness and grace. There is no confinement or constraint to inner vibrancy and joy.

“You have turned my sorrow into joyful dancing. No longer am I sad and wearing sackcloth. I thank you from my heart, and I will never stop singing your praises, my Lord and my God” ~ Psalm 30:11 – 12 (CEV)

girl dancing PJ file pin image

balloon 31 days blog file image 2014

This post is  the first of my #31days of writing brave and free.

Today I am inspired by the word ‘Move’ from Kate Motaung’s list of daily writing prompts that you can find here.

I will be joining in on an ad hoc, informal basis as energy and strength allow me too.

For more details please read this post over at ‘Word of Joy’. I hope you will be inspired to join in too! 

Because of Him

/ Joy Lenton / 13 Comments

child writing file image PJ because of him post

Writing is a strange occupation. Not one for the faint-hearted.

There are days where words flow freely and we write out our hearts.

On others, it feels like the tap has run dry and ceased its outpouring.

We squeeze and coax them to appear like getting blood out of a stone.

Some days they demand a great deal of energy to pin down on the page.

I’ve been trying to save energy because it will only stretch so far when you have M.E, and  life has recently become much busier for me in many ways.

If I extend myself too much it leads to a ‘crash and burn’ reaction which can cause further relapse in symptoms.

So I took a mini social media and blogging break to recoup some strength.

Pain has been pervasive and leached more life out of this weary frame. And sleep/rest/pacing have become the order of the day.

But I felt a creative itch and urge simmering beneath the surface. It’s never far away though it hibernates sometimes.

Little snatches of verse have been born (and some made public) as I joined in with poetic prompts on Twitter both prior to and since ending my needful break.

Listening and leaning are the new watchwords of my life this year and they are bearing fruit as I abide closer to God.

There is far less urgent clamour about my writing and a lot more trust that words will appear when they should.

I’m discovering it’s a restful place to be in as I surrender the whole process to God. He gives me all the inspiration and words I need.

I long to break free from rigid conformity, from formality, from ought and should, from comparison and feeling ‘less than’.

Joining in with Five Minute Friday has given me permission to ditch perfectionism and embrace the gift of the inspired moment as I offer my words to public scrutiny.

Here I am again, with renewed gratitude that stems from seeing how God uses weak, weary and wounded ones like you and me to speak out for Him.

I can write again. Words have come when I least expected them to….because of Him.

START…

‘Because’

Lord,

I don’t want to write

just because

it is what

I usually do

or because

I want to have a say

These words should come

because You

have thoughts You desire

me to convey

And You know just who

needs to be

encouraged by You

in prayerful offering

which becomes

sacrificial giving

surrendered in this way

So I come willingly

because that’s

how things ought to be

and happen naturally

Here is my pen, my mind,

my heart, my soul

Please take and use them

to bless, heal and help

make others whole

Write Your Word

upon my heart

Inscribe Your ideas

as I start

to write, and allow

them all to flow

because I

have surrendered them

into Your hands

and for Your plans

©JoyLenton2014

STOP.

pen and journal file pin image PJ

Joining here with Kate and fellow #FMF writers as we write bold and brave today. You are very welcome and warmly invited to join in and to discover how you can write this way every day for a whole month if you want to.

Hearts on pilgrimage

/ Joy Lenton / 6 Comments

hearts on pilgrimage file image

Reaching significant life markers can feel like a line being drawn in the sand.

Behind it may lie years of fruitful abundance, times of activity and usefulness.

In front is an unknown, untried, untested future ~ trusted to a known God.

My line in the sand came in my 30’s when I was working as a nurse.

I was struck down, laid low with M.E, and other chronic illness followed hot on its heels.

Time shuddered to a halt. A life divided into ‘now’ and ‘then’. I soon forgot what it felt like to feel well. 

God used the time to good effect. As I began to mourn the loss of health and career, He made me lie down by His still waters to examine my soul.

Provided good Christian counselling to encourage me to unearth my painful past and bring me into a place of greater release and freedom.

After nearly 10 years of weekly counselling sessions, I was finally emotionally healed from most of the events that had shaped me as a growing child/adult and poisoned my mind and heart.

Though some lingering after-effects continue to impact my life.

They too require the Healer’s ongoing tender touch.

Now, I remain a sojourner. A heart still set on pilgrimage.

“Blessed are those whose strength is in you, who have set their hearts on pilgrimage” ~ Psalm 84:5

My soul is still seeking safety, sanctuary and strength on a daily basis as it leans heavy on the Lord.

For we never stay the same, even if our circumstances do.

We are all growing, evolving, maturing and learning day by day.

And God never stops teaching us about Himself:the wonders of His love, the marvel of His grace, the sweetness of His Presence.

I may have just passed another milestone on the way to heaven, but I will never get beyond my desperate need of God.

We are built to yearn for Him, to desire to know Him, to set our hearts on following after His will and ways.

Because that’s the only certainty we have in this uncertain world ~ our God is totally loving, totally trustworthy and totally faithful to His children.

God’s best won’t necessarily look good to us while we are experiencing it, and often not until we understand what He is doing and allowing, but it will heal and deliver us in His own perfect timing and way.

‘On pilgrimage’

Marching on is the nature of souls

in search of becoming healed and whole

Our pilgrimage can span many long years

as we learn to walk bold and conquer fears

Stumbling through valleys deep with sand

we reach out for God’s proffered hand

When weak, worn out and weary we fall

we’re lifted up by the One who sees all

Blinded by tears we lose our way

God ensures we don’t go astray

Discouragement comes and hearts can fail

until we remember the Blood and nails

Our Saviour Lord trod this earthly soil

experienced its pain, suffering and toil

And when we follow hard after Him

He grants us strength when life looks grim

©JoyLenton2014

on pilgrimage poem pin file image PJ

Linking here with Beth,  Holley, and other like-minded friends as we seek to encourage one another in our walk of life and faith

Time to be ready

/ Joy Lenton / 12 Comments

autumnal trees

A new season starts and we wonder if we are ready for all it may entail.

The wind of change blows strong and all that we knew before is carried on its current into the Past.

Like the ever-changing seasons of life,  we too have seasons of the soul.

Maybe you’re in a preparation period, time to till the ground, turn over the soil and ensure it is in a receptive state to welcome and receive.

Maybe you’re readying yourself to sow some faith seeds in anticipation of a harvest to come.

Or could this be the period when God’s promises to you will finally be fulfilled?

Sometimes it feels like we spend forever in a waiting season, getting colder, battening down the hatches and hibernating.

We need reminders that there are cycles of change, life will bloom again and hopes will be met.

Aslan is stirring and Spring is coming to a land long-starved of joy and light.

Faith and hope will be brought to life again, and all that we have hung onto which doesn’t fit who we are in Christ will die a slow death as we co-operate and co-labour with God in the process.

I’m in a new season in many senses of the word and these things hang heavy in my soul.

And as I’ve thought and prayed I sensed God asking us, His church, the Bride of Christ, to make herself ready for His return.

To keep the flame alive, hold on to the hope that is in us.  He is at the door of our hearts.

We are the Light-bearers and Good News sharers to a dark and needy world.

We are the ones who live ever-hopeful of seeing the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living.

We are destined to be united in heart, mind and purpose  (in all the things that truly matter) as His children and His body on the earth.

Are we ready, friends?

‘Be ready’

Try to remain steady

as I’m making you ready

Preparation is a key part

of a transformed mind, life and heart

My best work cannot be rushed

and your soul must be hushed

to be receptive to My voice

Listen, sow,then you’ll rejoice

All of your life is open, laid bare

I see those things you willingly share

and others you try to hide away

will be brought forth in the light of day

No stone will be left unturned

in a heart that has yearned

to be touched and healed by Me

that longs above all to fly free

Before I can give you wings to fly

you may have unreleased tears to cry

as I seek to uncover and unearth

all that’s tethering you to earth

My will is for you to rise and shine

to reveal grace, to be wholly Mine

Come, My child, take My hand

This is time to be ready, here I stand

©JoyLenton2014

Linking my poem here with  Kate and other bold and brave writers  for #FMF as we go with the flow on the topic of ‘Ready’.

Also  joining with Jennifer as we #tellhisstory , with Mel for #essentialfridays and  with fellow writer friends, grace dwellers and sisters in Christ as we seek to live for Him and make Him known.

Ibis in Flight

A soft whisper

/ Joy Lenton / 14 Comments

A soft whisper file image PJ

Summer segues soft into Autumn and I sense a shift-change.

A call to quiet and calm. A whispered invitation of grace. A space to receive.

Making room for mercy moments in the mundane and eternal encounters in the everyday.

Words rise and fall in my head but fail to find their way onto the page.

My writing voice is stilled, though it clamours for release.

My mind feels overly busy with thoughts running around like headless chickens.

My body aches for rest, bed, soothing sleep, healing and restoration.

God wants me to be in tune with This season ~ a time to listen rather than speak, a time to refrain in order to gain the better part.

A heart receptive to His voice and a spirit that says Yes. A voice that whispers gentle and soft rather than shouting its presence.

All of which means that the things I long to share have been put on hold.. for now.

I am needing to focus more on the important than the urgent and make way for God’s ways most of all.

Yet He has encouraged me to send this poem forth because its message is timeless.

I wrote it in the flush of youthful love many moons ago, and published it two years ago on ‘Words of Joy’  in the context of a post about being seen, heard and loved.

I wrote the poem to my future husband, and as I read it again it speaks to me anew of our  heavenly Bridegroom calling for His Bride.

Maybe it also describes an intrinsic, eternal yearning inside us to be close, to feel cherished and loved, or maybe a way of seeing God in all of His creation?

However you take it, I pray God will use it to speak to you in the way you need to receive it.

‘Whisper your name’

Whisper your name in the

cold cubes of ice that

melt with heat’s breath

Whisper your name in the

wild, swirling tussle of

leaves on the ground

Whisper your name in the

snow that is black

with your words

Whisper your name in the

warm, woody ashes of

Winter that’s gone

Whisper your name in

Spring flowers that

nod out your greeting

Whisper your name in

the heavy haze of Summer sun

and Autumn sunsets

Whisper your name,

my love

and I’ll…..

whisper MINE

©JoyLenton2012

Praying for space for a sister to be slow, room for a recycled poem, and grace to come late to the party as I link here with Beth and friends for #threewordwednesday and with Kate for #FMF where this week’s  prompt is ‘Whisper’

**If you’d like to read more about words God has specifically whispered to my heart this year, then please feel free to check out the ‘Prayer Whispers’ category here**

A soft whisper file pin image PJ

Reaching out in faith

/ Joy Lenton / 8 Comments

reaching out FMF PJ file image

Hearts, hands and voices reach out to God.

There’s a yearning, a desperate need to be heard.

To have our needs fulfilled.

And so often it feels like we come up empty.

Prayers appear to go unanswered.

Hopes are dashed.

We droop with disappointment and discouragement.

But could it be that we fail to receive because we fail to fully believe He will answer?

Missed careful study of His word to see what He has already said about this issue.

Been impatient, failed to linger in His Presence long enough to hear a response.

Or we’ve already worked out just how the answer will look, and This. Isn’t. It.

And in our haste to have answers, we can so easily forget that God often uses our confusion and pain to rouse us into deeper dependence on Him.

God has already spoken fully through Jesus, the living Word of God Incarnate.

He speaks still in hearts receptive to His voice and surrendered to His will and ways.

“As the heavens are higher than the earth, so my ways are higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts” ~ Isaiah 55:9

In pondering this, here are my best ‘five-minute-friday’ thoughts on ‘Reach’:

‘Reaching out’

Sometimes answers to prayer feel out of reach

no matter what we say, think, pray or preach

It feels like something could be missing

or maybe we’re not too good at listening

Failing to heed Your written word

or receive its wisdom seen and heard

Yet, there are many ways in which You reach out

with love and goodness in a whisper, not a shout,

Soft breaths fall as dew in the morning air

as manna drops to feed us, and to share

We are never left empty or alone

because in every heart You make a home

And Your arms were impaled, pierced to a tree

to reach out to all suffering humanity

Revealing Your forgiveness, grace and love

as they poured like wine from heaven above

So as we sit and ponder, rush and hurry,

there is really no need for us to worry

You hear and answer every prayer

with Wait, Yes, No, I am here

©JoyLenton2014

reaching out FMF poem pin file image

Linking here with Kate for #FMF (as we write freely for five minutes flat, with the joy of abandoning perfection) about ‘Reach’, and with Jennifer as we reach out to encourage one another and #tellhisstory in the process. You are warmly invited and encouraged to join in.

There goes summer

/ Joy Lenton / 4 Comments

A book in the park PJ file image

It feels like summer has shied away from these shores. The days of sitting in a park reading a book seem long gone, unless we have our jeans and jackets on.

Maybe the UK gives it a chilly welcome to start with because it’s all so strange to us.

But we still have a deep appreciation for how it makes us feel.

For a few short weeks or months (if we are lucky) we can bathe in its rays. Allow skin to absorb some natural vitamin D. Let clothing and mood be light.

Make pretend we have days without end to linger, lounge and let loose. Night comes late and light seeps slow away.

Then just as we begin to stop moaning about the heat and start to enjoy the mediterranean-style food, feasting and feelings, it lifts its skirts and runs away.

Such is the position now.

August has been dire. All dirty rain, drear and gloom.

But hey, we Brits are made of stern stuff. We know how to laugh in the gales and smile through the showers, don’t we?

Or sit and reflect on season’s passing, as we enter a new season to live, love, learn and laugh at the days to come.

Or compose poetry that imagines the summer that never was. The one that got away, though we never did.

So here, in a last-ditch attempt to enjoy the season, I offer no deep thoughts or reflection today.

No, this is just a simple summery scene from the senses in gratitude for a gift of grace that often fades as swift as our tans. Though maybe a final flurry will warm our hearts before Autumn sets in.

Just because… life is too short to mourn what is lost and not embrace what lies ahead. And that’s a lesson for me as I slide ever closer toward a new decade and a new season to enjoy.

‘High summer’

Feathery quill strokes

soft across azure sky,

entrail cotton-wisps

threaded through the blue,

barely discernible hint

of shade or shadow

High summer living

ease-taking, merrymaking,

cares left to subside as bubbles

sparkling in water or wine

Dreamily drifting with eyes

closed tight against the sun

shaded by flick of hand,

with glasses swung on and off

as clothes get cast aside

and limbs bathe free

Chlorinated heat-waves

lapping over face and form

Shrieks and splashes sounding

muffled, entrenched as we are

in pursuit of floating oblivion,

relaxation, chilled-out living,

sunshine, sea and sweet savour

of pleasure ours for the taking

©JoyLenton2013

High summer living PJ file pin image

And here’s a little chill-out music to help you feel summery for just a bit longer…

Concealed and revealed

/ Joy Lenton / 8 Comments

concealed and revealed PJ file image

We are like icebergs. Only a small part of the enormity of who we are is visible on the surface.

Much lies hidden. Concealed to the untrained eye or casual observer.

Strangers to ourselves, with our lives laid bare before God.

Nothing about you or I is a surprise to Him. We are fully known and we are completely loved and accepted.

Yet how hard it can be sometimes to see the ‘real’ me/you or accept who we are.

I am a composite reflection of all the people I’ve ever been ~ a girl-child, a lost soul, a teen, Jesus follower, wife and mother become grandma, who has a degree of God-given insight into her ways.

But I feel I’ll always be a bit of a mystery to myself, because who I am in Christ is an ongoing construction, ‘work in progress’ here and into eternity.

And the woman I am now is a just a snapshot of the experiences, thoughts and feelings that help make up my disposition, character and ways of reacting.

She is ineffably changed through her faith in Christ and inextricably linked to her life on earth.

Until.. Jesus returns to free us from its chains and reveal all that has lain concealed.

For now, I seek to be as authentic as I know how as I lean heavy on the Lord and learn from Holy Spirit-whispered insights.

To live out the hope within me, to reveal God’s goodness and grace, and conceal nothing that might help another soul feel less alone, or become blessed and encouraged by my testimony.

We can all be grace-imparters, joy-bringers and gift-givers to others, flawed and imperfect as we are.

‘Concealed and revealed’

I tried

concealing all my fears

to hide

a waterfall of tears

I shied

from confessing faults and flaws

My pride

wanted to slam such open doors

Divide

my heart and mind and will

Inside

I was far from capable

I cried

out to You in grief and pain

You pried

away all my guilt and shame

You died

to release me from death’s sting

Beside

me now, You bring Peace within

A flood

washes clean all earthly stain

Your blood

renews, makes me whole again

©JoyLenton2014

#1000gifts ~ I’m so grateful to God for some brief energy and inspiration to write today, especially when both have been in short supply lately!

Linking here today with Beth and  Holley, and other encouraging friends as we seek to share words to inspire and bless your heart.

concealed and revealed PJ poem pin image

Show and tell

/ Joy Lenton / 6 Comments

show and tell file image PJ

As writers and poets we aim to show rather than tell.

Describe and entice. Provide and hold back.

To reveal something and conceal another.

“Don’t tell me the moon is shining; show me the glint of light on broken glass” ~ Anton Chekhov

To stir emotions. Leave a lingering essence to savour.

Draw the reader in and leave them wanting more.

Make space for senses to fill in the gaps.

For imagination to take over and inspiration to remain.

Yet in living out our faith in Christ we need both ‘show and tell’.

Demonstrate His hand at work in our lives.

Reveal His character and our need of Him.

Make as clear as we can those things which we know and understand.

Admit to a cloud of unknowing where we give way for mystery. What is now concealed will one day be revealed.

Share our testimony and share His story ~ the best news of all cries out for voices to declare it.

Such thoughts were in my mind as I wrote the poem below.

‘Show and tell’

Let your life reveal your faith in Me

Show forth My goodness and grace

in your character and face

Tell your healing testimony

to encourage others, bring Me glory

Tell My people I love them dearly

and ache for them to see it clearly

No matter what sorrows they go through

I have power to make all things new

Tell out My greatness among the nations

Reveal My kindness, proclaim My worth

Offering salvation with new birth

Give them hope of making a brand new start

as I transform their mind and heart

My arms reach out, My hand is ready

to save, protect, restore and steady

Urge them now to yield and to Come

to listen and trust in Jesus, My Son

©JoyLenton2014

show and tell poem pin file image PJ

Linking here with Kate  and other brave souls for #fiveminutefriday as we all write bold and free, share our stories and encourage one another. You are very welcome and warmly invited to join in. 

Come empty

/ Joy Lenton / 14 Comments

come empty welcome file image PJ

We all long to have our love tanks filled. Be affirmed. Be welcomed. Be accepted.

But so often our desire to be seen and heard drives us into places where we shine bright as fire-flies briefly dancing bold in the darkness before it swallows us up and consumes us.

There is another way to satiate our thirsty souls. To discover all we are looking for.

There is a place where we come empty and become filled to overflowing.

Arrive with burdens too heavy to bear, with songs dying on our lips, with eyes full of tears.

Sink low with our sorrows, sickness and shame.

But there.. we are loved,  embraced, held and comforted beyond measure.

You don’t have to dress up or pretend. You can be real. Be yourself. Breathe easy.

In God’s presence we find hope, healing, help, strength, forgiveness and grace.

And so much more besides.

So come to Him now. Lay aside your fears. He won’t reject or ignore you.

Come empty. Come  weary. Come thirsty. Come hungry. Come Just. As. You. Are.

He is waiting,  and will never turn you away.

‘Being filled’

With arms yawning empty, wide,

I arrive at your feet

hardly daring to lift my weary head

with a body yearning only for bed

When a dawning peace

envelops my soul

as you come and abide

ready to make me whole

rest in my heart, take ease and wait

while I sob, breathe deep and hesitate..

Finally, some strength seeps

through as I stay and weep

How could so much time

have taken wings, flown by

How could I have allowed

my soul to become so dry?

You smile and reach out

in reminder, with goodness and grace

There’s always a look of love on your face

You tilt my head toward your own and spill

everything given, overflowing to fill

And I realise, deep down,

it has always been there

if I’d only stopped, searched around

instead of drowning in despair

For all you long to provide, impart,

has already been sealed within my heart

©JoyLenton2014

being filled poem PJ FMF file pin image

Linking here with Kate Motaung for her first time hosting #fiveminutefriday Do come over, join with other brave and bold five minute writers, and give her a warm welcome! Also linking with Jennifer for #tellhisstory and with Mel for #essentialfridays