loss

And we weep:ode to Charleston

/ Joy Lenton / 2 Comments

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Life is a precious gift, one we often fail to fully appreciate or see it for the wonder that it is.

And when lives seem to be prematurely torn apart, destroyed at the hands of another, then it hurts us all.

We feel the pain.

We ache with grief.

We mourn the loss.

We are connected in our weak and wounded humanity.

We see death steal vitality.

We seek answers and come up empty.

And we turn, as hearts do in their ache and confusion, toward the Author of life Himself.

We cry out.

We rage against the dying of the light.

We feel impotent in the face of injustice.

We weep.

And soon, we sense Him near.

Holding us close.

And weeping just the same…

And He wept

Outside, an ordinary day where wind

whispered a soft summer night breeze

Inside, some folks coughed and others

gently leafed through open Bible

nestled on their knees

Rippling the reverent hush

falling all around, while God’s word

was heard and devoured

And little did they know how

soon all silence would be shattered

when the room reverberated

with bullets…

Meanwhile God, contracted to a span,

incomprehensibly made man, saw

as He had on earth, how vile

humanity’s insanity can be

And He wept…

bitterly for those He loved, for

those He gave His all, who

scattered now like scarlet petals

crumpled to the ground

His heart tore, contracted even more

in sorrow, wept afresh with His

amazing grace

©JoyLenton2015

as petals fall to ground file image

We will not forget you, Charleston.

We will join our voices with your own.

We will not rest while unrest sits so deep in human souls.

We will not give up while anger rules and lives are stolen.

We will pray for hearts to be transformed and for the Prince of peace to break down barriers, transform and make lives new, bring hope and healing, forgiveness and faith for the future.

You are not alone.

We stand with you.

All beauty fades

/ Joy Lenton / Leave a comment

all beauty fades PJ poem image 1

“Charm is deceptive and beauty soon fades. The woman to be admired and praised is the woman who lives in the Fear-of-God” ~ Proverbs 31:30 (The Message)

‘All beauty fades’

All beauty fades

Each petal that falls

Each shaking loose

Each uncovering

lets in more shade

Soon there will be

nullifying nakedness

Bare stems remain

as thin reminder

Appeal for mercy

all beauty fades PJ poem image 2

And even these

droop low to ground

Stoop old, sigh

final breath

Lase last leaves

A turn to grey

Grave mulch and dust

A crumbling ash

from whose ember

new life holds sway

©JoyLenton2015 

“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, and into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade – kept in heaven for you, who through faith are shielded by God’s power until the coming of the salvation that is ready to be revealed in the last time” ~ 1 Peter 1:3-5

all beauty fades PJ poem image 3

Finding freedom

/ Joy Lenton / 10 Comments

Living within the constraints of chronic illness, or other limitations, needn’t mean living a limited life.

We may have to be more creative in the ways we seek soul sustenance.

Have support and input from others, perhaps.

Imagination and insight play their part.

Freedom can be found in unexpected ways and places.

I am discovering how my mind and spirit can roam free even if my body cannot.

And how feeling chained is a state of mind.

Being captive to circumstances is a choice.

Being free is another.

‘Freedom’

I’m blue-sky

thinking,

dreaming, drifting,

white-clouded

pillow-sinking

A vast horizon

hones into view ~

inviting, enticing,

warmly beckoning

to me and to you

Feel the sand yield

beneath your feet,

salt-tangled breeze,

melting mists that

waft and greet

Wet pavements glistening

in the sun,

as we shuffle,

amble, or break

into a run

Noisy clamour of

a city-busy throng,

elbowing, thrusting

through crowds

to where we belong

Stinging crystalline snowflakes

bite our faces,

reshaping the familiar

into landscapes

of inaccessible places

Even when confined

to bed or chair,

my unfettered mind

is free

to roam anywhere

All it takes

is a pause, glimpse, a look,

with time to reflect ~

on the words and images

contained in a book.

©JoyLenton2012

freedom poem pin

**NOTE** As you can see, this is one of my ‘here’s one I made earlier’ poems for such a time as this. It originally appeared on this post on my blog, ‘Words of Joy’, where I spoke about adjusting to loss, and the freedom we can have in Christ.

National Poetry month 2014 image

 

Lost time

/ Joy Lenton / 10 Comments

Do you ever wonder where time disappears to? Me too.

Each and every one of us has the same 24 hour allocation yet none of us will spend those hours in exactly the same way.

As an M.E and chronic illness sufferer, time may seem endless in terms of hoping for improvement and recovery.

Sleep can prove elusive and erratic.

Rest is far from restful if pain intrudes too much.

The life I dream of seems to slip through my fingers like grains of sand while I scramble to catch them.

Where did all those wasted minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, and even years go?

I was laid low,  or slept through many of them.

Moans at midnight.  Sighs at dawn.  A body rising stiff to greet a day already half over for many.

Here I am:

A woman with training and experience that lies wasted.

A nurse needing care myself.

A poet penning in PJs.

A wife without the means to be a proper helpmate or companion.

I wrote the poem below at such a time of introspection. It spoke for how I felt then and may speak into your situation too.

‘Black Hole’

There’s a space

in my life

where time disappears

down a black hole

already littered

with discarded hopes

dreams and desires

enough to fill

several craters

stacked high

or light

a multitude

of funeral pyres

Where does it all go?

How do these things

slip away

from my grasp

writhing hither and thither

with eel-like slither

when all I want

to do

is clasp them

to my heart

and cry, “Stay!”

Maybe I’ve

risked too much

extended thought

and expended energy

on things not

really meant to be

some crazy schemes

foolish inanities

to become

a bonfire

of the vanities

©JoyLenton2013

And yet..

This is looking at things from a limited human perspective only.

Time is redeemable when our days and ways are surrendered to the One beyond its restrictions.

He uses everything in our lives for His purposes. Not a crumb is wasted.

How do you feel about time disappearing? 

Love and loss

/ Joy Lenton / 4 Comments

Since time immemorial, poets have written about love and loss.

Such topics are natural outpourings of the soul.

My words are not always drawn from experience.

Sometimes a hint exists.

And more than a large share of poetic imagination.

I’ll leave you to guess which.

The poem here was written a few years back in the heady days of love given and received, coupled with those painful times of love denied or lost, and published here for the first time.

‘Outlived love’

Distillation

of quiet, unbroken tears

wells up between us.

What can I say?

Channels block

Stop

and locks are drawn

though finely

as a thin veil covering

the Past and refusing

re-entry to the future.

Something

slowly dies

creeping with cowardice

from our hearts ~

a love we once trusted

but lost.

©JoyLenton2013

Human love can take us to dizzy heights or plummeting depths of emotion.

It is a wonderful yet fragile thing, prone to alteration and change, often as fickle as our feelings.

The only love that is totally unconditional, constant, continual, dependable, eternal, forgiving and ever-giving is the love of God as seen in Christ Jesus our Lord and Saviour.

In it’s pure, Holy flame we can rest secure. Feel safe. Be comforted, warmed and encouraged. Breathe easy. Feel completely accepted and validated.

“We love because he first loved us” ~ 1 John 4:19

Day 25 ~ 31 days of #poetryforthesoul

Sharp side of life

/ Joy Lenton / 13 Comments

It’s been the worst of times and the best of times.

Recent weeks have been a period of great turmoil when it felt like everything that could be shaken was being shaken.

The past I thought dead and buried in memory rose up to greet me with renewed darkness and pain.

The present brought challenge and a pressing need for change I didn’t feel ready for.

Nothing felt safe anymore.

My heart was exposed.

Raw. Wounded. Hurting.

I wrote the poem below to express how it felt.

Maybe you can relate to it too.

Shards

Waterfall of rain

sheets hard and fast

steady on pane

with resounding drum

as I wall up my heart

with frame of glass

encasing erratic thrum

ready to part

and shatter all content within

leaving me raw

exposed, bleeding

vulnerability

all over the place

pain stabbed deep

wounded, lanced

shards sharp

piercing steep

in fiery dance of fury

on softness

exposing traces of all

kept hidden over time

and years

when nothing hurtful

allowed entry in this space

and vale of tears

©JoyLenton2013

Yet…there was a new surge of life within as the frame of my thinking shattered.

The old ways had to give way to deep excavation, renovation, rebuilding and renewal.

Peace and purpose grew from pain.

Shattered life made safe by God’s continual presence.

And Christ bled vulnerable for me and you.

He suffered deep dark pains within so that we could be recipients of His love.

There is nothing we go through that is a mystery to God.

He wants to re-write our history in the light of His grace.

His arms are ready to catch His broken child.

God alone can make us whole again.

Are you willing to offer Him your brokenness in exchange for His desires for you?

I know I can trust no other to mend me fully and set me on the right path again.

Veiling and revealing

/ Joy Lenton / 16 Comments

Autumn is a season where we begin to experience a shift-change in our natural environment. Leaves take on a brilliant kaleidoscope hue; they glow as invitingly as the open fires we long to huddle over. Its colours warm our eyes and hearts. Its mists breathe out mystery. Its transience lends itself to reflection. For it’s a portent of death and dying with leaves falling and flowers losing their bloom. It lends itself well to poetic ponderings. The poem below arose at such a time.

Veiled

Sweeping across the veils of loneliness and despair

beautiful in its death

Autumn mists cling hopefully to me

a season’s sea-changing tidal broom

But do I rather cling to them

sensing reflections of death ~ my death

as I cling to you with crying need

unheeding the shattered veils

of our past

and the  reborn curtains

cutting across our future

We may rejoice in the untold beauty

that exists

now within a leaf

now within us two

as Autumn eclipses our moods

but decay stands

hoveringly with splendour

a quiet presence but always there

I stand as one amazed

and yet aware

watching this poem falling

into my mind and tumbling

rudely into yours

with no more grace than I possess

Receive it into your heart

for it was written for the deep corners

and already lay

embedded there before

it was begun

©JoyLenton2013

In plant life, dying is a precursor to new life springing forth in time to come. In human life, we can learn to die to selfishness and self-preoccupation as we allow God’s gift of new life in Christ to take root. If we hold on to a life of personal gain and are not prepared to embrace change, then we risk becoming destroyed on the inside – even as we give every appearance of being alive. Embracing the life offered us in Christ means hope, growth, change and potential for today and all the days yet to come.